Monday, July 19, 2010

The Beginning

Ok....So I have spent the last 2 weeks reading and taking in everyone's perspective on losing weight.

I am sure of one thing. I need/will lose at least 50 lbs in a little over 3 months.
I can do this.

I think this blog will help me stay accountable.

A little bit about me:
*I am 26 years old [going through a quarter life crisis :)]
*I have always had issues with food.
*I have always thought i needed to weigh less.
*I have had issues with ED, drugs, cutting,and co-dependency.
*I have been thin on the scales, but never thin in my mind.
*I recently gained 60+ lbs within 7.5 months to basically get out of a relationship.
I was in a long distance relationship and the guy REFUSED to leave. I knew it
wasn't a good know, that gut feeling? well...everytime i was
with him, I knew it wasn't good. So, I did a little self sabatoge and it wasn't
the weight that was the problem--it was my insecuries that led to destruction
and demise of that relationship. (good to be out of the
relatioship, but left
with the weight and insecurities that go with it.)
I am not going to share my current weight right now....i will...i just need time to come to terms with it. Keep in mind- I have never been this it is not "normal" to me.

If i can be an advocate for anything, it would be ANTI-antidepressants.

I disliked the circumstance of my relationship (long distance)so much that I turned to antidepressants.

After gaining all the weight, I started googling my prescription and, in horror, I was reading about others who gained weight because of it as well. I know everyone is different, but for me, it STOPPED my metabolism. Which they are known to do (or atleast slow it down). So combine that with emotional eating and VOILA- an excess shell of a body that took less than 8 months to acquire.

I am determined to be better than I was before I was in that relationship!

I am ready to start the new chapter of my life....there is not a doubt in my mind that i can do this. It's just a matter of DOING IT.


  1. Wishing you all the luck, but you are right - you just have to do it.


  2. Following others & commenting on their blogs helps people find your blog. This community is wonderful, I hope you find the same support that I've enjoyed.

  3. you're a bit of a newbie, I see :) well, I'm kinda new here too. and it really helps to have and read about all of the support, and give support of your own. so, be strong, because the beginning is haaaaaaard.

  4. I can relate to so much of what you have said.
    I am a pro at self sabotage. Sometimes over eating can not only be comforting, but is also a great way to build up a protective wall when in pain.
    When I first began my blog, I was afraid to state my stats. I was overwhelmed by how much I had let myself go.
    Many antidepressants list weight gain as a possible side-effect. But not all can truly be attributed to it.
    I personally prefer anti-anxiety meds though. It relieves my sadness and remain focused. Stress can lead to bad in my life, especially when it comes to poor eating.
    I really look forward to reading more of you posts.
    xoxo zen